Noelle (mistiza) wrote in med_rejects,

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New member post, old worries.

Hey all,

Just found out about this community while at work, and I felt compelled to post. What I'm looking for I suppose are people to relate to, since there aren't much that I know of who have gone exactly through what I'm going through, or are presently worrying about their future.

So what am I going through anyway? Here's a little bit about me.

I'm a 2004 UCLA graduate with a B.S. in Psychobiology, and am taking my "year off" to apply to medical school. Thing is, I submitted my AMCAS primary all the way back at the end of June/early July, was complete with most secondaries by October, and have only garnered one interview and a couple of pre-interview holds. Well, not to mention a whole lot of rejections as well, as most of you can relate to, especially in this community.

Granted, my interview wasn't as horrible as the other post here, but I'm hoping they'll do some "creative interpretation" with that performance.

Worries about low MCATs, not so spectacular GPA, and would've could've's all around with volunteering have filled my mind ever since I've just been waiting for a response, any response.

Since I've begun this long and arduous application process, I've fallen into a mild depression. I swing in and out of moods all of the time, and when I hear of other people's success (especially co-workers in the lab I work in) or when the subject comes up at the bad time, I can cry on the spot. Happiness always comes with a catch these days, just because my future isn't set like it seemed to be during my undergraduate years. My parents, relatives, and friends have been invaluable to me during this time of need, but I hate burdening them with so many emotional outbursts.

People tell me, "There's always next time," and that I can always go another route. Logical to the brain, yes. To the heart that has yearned for this profession for years and years? Illogical.

Do any of you wish you could do it all over?

Sometimes I wish this whole process were already over so I can start living life again, whether it be as a medical student (crosses fingers) or working toward another goal.

I'd love to be able to talk to any of you who have or are going through this same situation. LJ comments and AIM messages are very welcomed and wanted very much.

Thanks for reading this (long-winded) VENT! (Now off to bettering myself, I suppose)
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